I’ve become aware to how I can’t look you in the eye anymore, when shame is an epitaph written on every cell in my body, you know.
I’m embarrassed to tell you what I’m thinking half the time, knowing that your disappointment is measured like charts and graphs, so I don't bother anymore.
I keep it to myself while building up this home, until it falls apart again, and I can watch from a safe distance.
And I’ll throw myself down the stairs, Just to see if blood is as real as they say. And I’ll eat myself bite my bite, Just to have a decent meal for once, When this is everyday.
Watch it burn, watch it burn, watch it burn. So I came here to watch you fall down. Watch it burn, watch it burn, watch it burn. I just came to pick myself up now.
Wrapped inside like a veil or blanket, Things are only as bad as i can imagine. When my courage dies I’ll follow you, December. The ground is blessed by winter, and so am i shakes and all.
I can’t stay strong. Don't let me go...
Please let me go.
And I’ll learn to love myself in the fire. (When embers start to become cascades) And I can be a martyr. (If you’ll just be my saint) When this is everyday. When you carry me back home, Don’t tell me you love me. I have no excuse... just...
Same regrets, same mistakes, Same thoughts flow through my head. How do you live, when you’re your own punishment?