Funny Honey Renee Zellweger / Reilly, John C. / Colm Feore
[ROXIE] Sometime's I'm right Sometime's I'm wrong But he doesn't care He'll String along He loves me so That funny honey of mine
Sometime's I'm down Sometime's I'm up But he follows 'round Like some droopy-eyed pup He love me so That sunny honey of mine
He ain't no sheik That's no great physique Lord knows, he ain't got the smarts
Oh, but look at that soul I tell you, the whole Is a whole lot greater than The sum of his parts
And if you knew him like me I know you'd agree What if the world Slandered my name? Why, he'd be right there Taking the blame
He loves me so And it all suits me fine That funny, sunny, honey Hubby of mine
[AMOS (Spoken)] A man's got a right to protect his home and his loved ones, right?
[FOGARTY (Spoken)] Of course, he has.
[AMOS (Spoken)] Well, I came in from the garage, Officer, and I see him coming through the window. With my wife Roxanne there, sleepin'...like an angel...
[ROXIE] He loves me so That funny honey of mine
[AMOS (Spoken)] ...an angel!
[AMOS (Spoken)] I mean supposin', just supposin', he had violated her or somethin'...you know what I mean... viloated?
[FOGARTY (Spoken)] I know what you mean...
[AMOS (Spoken)] ...or somethin'. Think how terrible that would have been. It's a good thing I came home from work on time, I'm tellin' ya that! I say I'm tellin' ya that!
[ROXIE] He loves me so That funny honey of mine
[FOGARTY (Spoken)] Name of deceased... Fred Casely.
[AMOS (Spoken)] Fred Casely. How could he be a burglar? My wife knows him! He sold us our furniture!
[ROXIE] Lord knows he ain't got the smarts
[AMOS (Spoken)] She lied to me. She told me he was a burglar!
[FOGARTY (Spoken)] You mean he was dead when you got home?
[AMOS (Spoken)] She had him covered with a sheet and she's givin' me that cock and bull story abou this burglar, and I ought to say that I did it 'cause I was sure to get off. Burglar, huh!
[ROXIE] Now, he shot off his trap
I can't stand that sap
Look at him go Rattin' on me With just one more brain What a half-wit he'd be
If they string me up I'll know who Brought the twine
[AMOS (Spoken)] And I believed her! That cheap little tramp. So, she Was two-timing me, huh? Well, then, she can just Swing for all I care. Boy, I'm down at the garage, Working my butt off fourteen Hours a day and she's up mucnhin' on god-damn bon bons and jazzing. This time she pushed me too far. That little chiseler. Boy, what I sap I was!