Original music video: youtu.be/hP3431Ao28Q (vk.com/rhett_and_link)
I was making my rounds at Splashy Town, You know, the indoor water park. Shutting down the endless wave, Dead of night, pitch dark.
Just to clarify, I'm a security guard, Not a lifeguard who stayed too late. My weapon is a pool noodle.
A glint of light pierced the night. I saw some popcorn, bro. Scooped it up and tossed it back — It was teeth I don't know, It was teeth I don't know, It was teeth I don't know... (Just to clarify, I did know they were teeth, I just didn't know whose teeth they were.)
Who left these teeth? Who needs them now? Who's sitting on the couch Gummin' on some crunchy chow? Ooooohhhhhh
Me. I'm eating peanut brittle And I'm fed up. You see I lost my teeth earlier today In a fight at a waterpark called Splashy Town. I'm gonna break into Splashy Town. Tonight. Right now.
I'm breaching the slide That runs outside, I'm gummin' an entrance hole, Reaching the spot where my teeth got knocked To get the teeth that I know.
The teeth that he knows, The teeth that he know-
What was that? It felt like a pool noodle!
It was a pool noodle. I'm the security guard, And that's my weapon.
Well, I was just looking for my teeth, man.
You're looking for teeth?
Yeah, I lost them in a battle with a man earlier today In this vicinity.
That's an amazing coincidence, I recently found some teeth That I did not know.
Let me see 'em. Oh, yup, they're mine.
He left his teeth, He's got them now. No more sitting on the couch Gummin' on some crunchy chow... Oooooohhhhh
By the way, you know anything about a hole over in the slide?
Yeah, I gummed my way in that way. I'll also be leaving that way, You might wanna patch it up afterward.