the very first time i remember you, you're blonde and don't love me back. the next time you're brunette, and you do. after a while i give up trying to guess if the colour of your hair means anything. because even if you don't exist, i am always in love with you. i remember most fondly those lifetimes where we get to grow up together, when you share your secrets and sorrows and hiding places with me. i love how you play along with my bad ideas, before you grow up and realize they are bad ideas. (and in our times together i have so many bad ideas.) when we meet as adults you're always much more discerning. i don't blame you. yet, always, you forgive me. as if you understand what's going on, and you're making up for all the lifetimes in which one of us doesn't exist, and the ones where we just, barely, never meet. i hate those. i prefer the ones in which you kill me. but when all's said and done, i'd surrender to you in other ways. even though each time, i know i'll see you again, i always wonder is this the last time? is that really you? and what if you're perfectly happy without me? ah, but i don't blame you; i'll never burn as brilliantly as you. it's only fair that i should be the one to chase you across ten, twenty-five, a hundred lifetimes until i find the one where you'll return to me.
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