Master Of The House [Отверженные / Les Misérables]
My band of soaks, my den of dissolute's My dirty jokes, my always pissed as newts My sons of whores spend there lives in my inn, Homing pigeons homing in They fly through my doors, And their money's good as yours!
Welcome, Monsieur, sit yourself down And meet the best innkeeper in town As for the rest, all of 'em crooks: Rooking their guests and crooking the books Seldom do you see Honest men like me A gent of good intent Who's content to be
Master of the house, doling out the charm Ready with a handshake and an open palm Tells a saucy tale, makes a little stir Customers appreciate a bon-viveur Glad to do a friend a favor Doesn't cost me to be nice But nothing gets you nothing Everything has got a little price!
Master of the house, keeper of the zoo Ready to relieve 'em of a sou or two Watering the wine, making up the weight Pickin' up their knick-knacks when they can't see straight Everybody loves a landlord Everybody's bosom friend I do whatever pleases Jesus! Won't I bleed 'em in the end!
Master of the house, quick to catch yer eye Never wants a passerby to pass him by Servant to the poor, butler to the great Comforter, philosopher, and lifelong mate! Everybody's boon companion Everybody's chaperone
But lock up your valises Jesus! Won't I skin you to the bone!
Food beyond compare. Food beyond belief Mix it in a mincer and pretend it's beef Kidney of a horse, liver of a cat Filling up the sausages with this and that Residents are more than welcome Bridal suite is occupied Reasonable charges Plus some little extras on the side!
Charge 'em for the lice, extra for the mice Two percent for looking in the mirror twice Here a little slice, there a little cut Three percent for sleeping with the window shut When it comes to fixing prices There are a lot of tricks he knows How it all increases, all them bits and pieces Jesus! It's amazing how it grows!
Master of the house, quick to catch yer eye Never wants a passerby to pass him by Servant to the poor, butler to the great Comforter, philosopher, and lifelong mate! Everybody's boon companion Gives 'em everything he's got
Dirty bunch of geezers Jesus! What a sorry little lot!
I used to dream that I would meet a prince But God Almighty, have you seen what's happened since?