I burned every book that you wrote and left the ashes on the floor in the hallway. I drove home on the same old roads, and watched your ghosts dance from the causeway. And I know that everyone that I love will someday come back to haunt me. So I lie with people I hate because it was meant to be. I watched everything walk away as the summer sun set beneath the autumn leaves, and I couldn't help but smile. Fourteen years have passed with the same old stony faced grin. I'm still learning how to laugh, I'm still learning how the swim. Looking back at all these hazy eyes, the cracked up teeth, and the crooked smiles made everything suddenly seem worth it. For a minute I was trying to say to you that the rain could wash us all away. When the sun swallows the earth, I'll be rejoicing. This is what made me learn to stand tall in the face of every condescending failure. But now I'm standing up in the face of failure. And I still remember every time I cried after you died. At the funeral I realized we're born alone, we breathe alone, we cry alone, we grieve alone. We're born alone, we breathe alone, we cry alone, we die alone. But now I've come to terms with words that I have learned. We all die alone, and I know it. Just keep me breathing. And I can't help but think of every wasted day colliding with every night that I have stayed awake. My tired soul can't take the spinning anymore.
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