Sometimes I get so silent I can hear my heartbeat Sometimes I get so silent, the memories come back to me But now I know, there is suffering no one should have to feel Hiding the truth, because it wasn’t safe to be open with who I was, it left me in agony The shame, the sadness, the darkness surrounded every part of my being I had no compassion, no love for myself, there was no relief Except in thoughts of death I have learned to love myself, I have learned to care, I have learned to make peace with the sadness and despair I had no compassion, no love for myself, there was no relief Except in thoughts of death I was so alone, buried in sadness, love dragged me out of it I want to love with the courage of an open heart