One day I launched a rocket up into the moon And landed on a crater in a blue lagoon Three girls in the nude, in the pool they had room Screamin', "Starbuck we wanna have a orgy with you"
But never in my life had I seen green bitches And when I want they would grant me three wishes One was a pound of the blue moon hydro Twistin' it up, watch my divine mind blow
Two was a pair, of gravity boots With a space helmet, and a Nike moon suit They took me from the pool up to the bedroom Where wish number three, my dick they consumed
They hittin' me off orally so lovely Now those dainty ladies they took it easily Time flew by, no weed, time to leave It's time to get back to Earth at breakneck speed
I told the moon bitches that I'd see 'em again And thank you very much for the weed and the head They were three moon girls, I fucked every one That story is over, but my rhyme ain't done
This is how I get where the fuck I get I went to Harlem so I could get some wet I bought the dutch out of the bodega Left a cloud of black smoke in the air
Took a '99 Beetle, on a magical mystery tour Your, narrator's pedal hits the floor Saw a hardcore, punk rave bitch yellin', "Fuck the law" Guzzlin' alcohol, leather jacket and a bra
Boots militant, her nose caked up with [Incomprehensible] Kicked her in the face, yellin' Kent Dipped cigarette, Masai Bai is on cassette I'm chewin' on her nipples like nicorette
Crashed into a Corvette, doin' eighty Face hit the back she went through the glass of the Mercedes Crushed all her bones, and I hear every one That crime is over, but my rhyme ain't done
Captain Crunch was a slanger of narcotic cereals And Toucan Sam was his right hand "Man" Now Sam was a skimmer, a mini-wheat slinger Killed Count Chocula with the snap of his finger
Tony the Tiger was his arch-enemy So anthrax Apple Jacks disguised as Sugar Smacks To add to that, he was flippin' Fruity Pebbles Told the hoe to hit the skids, 'cause Trix was for kids
Snap Crackle Pop sellin' Krispies on your block Lucky the Leprechaun is suckin' up top My man Sugar Bear was the one they feared most 'Cause he was always known to pack that Cinnamon Toast
Boo Berry got caught, at the Honeycomb Hideout The man with the Wheaties was a former wide out There were ninety-nine cereals, I ate every one That story is over, but my rhyme ain't done
I met this kid named Bob Skarm, he had a farm His pops got shot by his little brother in the front lawn So he inherits the land, comes up with a master plan Put Cuba out of B.I., he hands me a C.I.
I got a half a acre, need help with the cultivatin' Thirty-percent of the gross, hands me toast, let's roast I got a four-wheeler, no street dealers will mega Cage Won't even leave the state and drop Indelible weight
Pushed the plow, from here to Moscow, where do I start now? Burn the crops if you see cops call blaow blaow I got it, whippin' the tractor blotted Before the first harvest in the corn rows Cage spotted
The tail ends, under surveillance, merc the crop Run up, [Incomprehensible] got knocked for the smoke lookin' at twenty summers Six hundred plants, and they burnt every one That story is over, but my rhyme ain't done
Now I'ma tell you what the fuck this means From nine one four L.E.S. and Queens Two lyrical technicians that came to play Number one Smut Peddler, Eon and Cage
Just a little somethin' that we made up Sick lies on time, Mighty Mi on the cut Some of it is fiction, and some of it fact Now they love a dumb rap on a heavy drum track
They were mad fuckin' hoes and we fucked every one That story is over, and my rhyme is done