The Most Offensive Song Ever (Mr. Hankey and Kenny McCormick)
The Most Offensive Song Ever
Howdy Ho. Virgin Mary was sleepin' When Angel Gabriel appeared He said, "You are to be the virgin mother." But Mary thought that was weird. Mary said, "I'm not a virgin. I blew a guy last year." But then Gabriel said to Mary, "My child, have no fear."
Oh, you can suck all the dick you want And still be a virgin, Mary. You can suck all the dick you want And still not be considered flawed. Although you went to town and sucked some semen down, You're still a virgin in the eyes of God.
There was no room at the inn When Mary and Joseph did arrive. But they were so very tired, you see, And Mary had to offer a bribe. Since she had no money, How would she pay for a place to sleep? Gabriel appeared to Mary And told her not to weep.
'Cause you can suck all the dick you want And still be a virgin, Mary. You can suck all the dick you want And still be the mother of Christ. If there's no room at the inn, then it's not considered a sin To suck some dick to get a room for the night!
Then, three wise men did appear Bearing gifts of myrrh and such They said that they had followed a star And missed a woman's touch Mary thought she might pleasure them But could not take them to bed. But again, Gabriel appeared to her And this is what he said:
"You can suck all the dick you want And still be a virgin, Mary. You can suck all the dick you want Every one that hangs in the nation. Fellatio ain't no sin. Go on and blow those Three Wise Men And you'll still be a virgin 'cause there was no penetration!
So, you can suck all the dick you want And still be a virgin, Mary. The donkey and the ox and the lambs And even the little drummer boy People will remember your name quick. They'll say "Damn, that bitch could suck a good dick!" 'Cause sucking dick brings peace on Earth and joy.
[slowing] 'Cause sucking dick brings peace on Earth and [normal] joy. Mary, Mary, suck that dick.