Princess Peach Won't you listen to my speech I don't have any stars of invincibility But you're the brightest star in the sky tonight for me I'm your Luigi
[Egoraptor]
What up, bitch I got a one-up, bitch What's inside the question block; it's my dick It's-a-me, a-Mario, I'm more Italian than pastrami I'll take you by the peaches and give you the hot salami I save you from dragons and evil Boos that are spooky Must I be a raccoon to get inside your tanooki I will mount you like Yoshi and show you things you've never seen My mushroom's now mega, if you know what I mean So suck it
[Danny Sexbang] Mario, you always do this shit I like a girl and then you ruin it By yelling stuff about your dick Until they go away
[Rachel Bloom]
Hey Luigi, it's okay That Mario's a bit risque Just tell me what you need to say Please don't be afraid
[Danny Sexbang]
Oh, princess, it means so much for me to hear you say that The only thing I've ever wanted to tell you is that-goddamn it
[Egoraptor]
I'm here to pleasure that ass I'd like to go first, princess, but I always come last And you say we'll get together but I'm jacking off alone Koopa Troopa skeletons are the only dry bone I am tired of the running 'round it's such a fucking hassle I go through shit and then you're in another fucking castle You gotta think about it, well I don't believe the hype You'll have a lot of time to think when you are smoking on my warp pipe
[Rachel Bloom]
O-M-G, I can't decide On which of you should be the guy To take me on your mustache ride That'll redefine my life
[Rachel Bloom and Danny Sexbang]
I'm ready to give love a shot It's not about how many coins you've got I just know I like you a lot [Ego] Yo, sluts, check out my yacht (Ugh)
[Danny] Let me take you on a magic kart ride [Ego] I'll bust all your balloons when I smack your backside [Danny] We'll have such fun, I'll bring my friends along
[Egoraptor]
I'll kick that Donkey Kong right in his konkey dong Come on, Peach, it's time to make your choice I'm the only plumber that can your boobies rejoice Green, lanky-ass brother ain't got shit on me It's time to live out our story, of the princess and the pe- Nis
[Outro]
[Ego] So, who's it gonna be, princess? [Rachel] I choose...Toad [Both] Toad?! [Rachel] Well his whole body's shaped like a dick [Both] Oh yeah, mmmhm, yeah, definitely, mushrooms look like dicks