Stewie: You've got to look your best tonight You tubby little parasite Cause there's a lovley lady and she's waiting for you
And though her pretty face may seem A special person's wettest dream Before you get to see it there are things you must do
We'll try a tie And boutonnière of yellow
Or a rose that shows That you're a classy fellow
With a posh panache Of Jefferson and Monticello Busting out a mile with style
I know you just can't wait to stare At all that luscious orange hair But boy before you touch a single curl You must impress that ultra-boomin', All-consumin', poorly-groomin' Down syndrome girl
On any normal day you reek As if you were on a farting streak Your finger's up your nose and you're dripping with drool
But if you want a lady's love You're better off by smelling of A gentlemen's cologne instead of sneakers and stool
A squirt, a spurt Of something just for Ellen And you'll see that she Will find you so compelin' And she does because The only smell that she'll be smellin' Won't be coming from your bum
You wanna take that little whore And spin her on the dancing floor But boy before you do a single twirl
You must impress that effervescing, Self-possesing, no-BS-ing Down syndrome girl
Her eyes are emerald portals To a secret land of love And her smile is like the sweetest summer flower Her kiss is so inviting And her hugs are so delighting
And what makes them really nice Is that they've got a little spice Because they're tighter than a vice And they go on for an hour
(Stewie and Chris tap dance)
My boy, between the two of us We'll get you on that shorty bus And then you're gonna take it for a whirl
Now go impress that super-thrilling Wish-fulfilling, Yoo-Hoo spilling, Ultra-swinging, boner-bringing, Gaily singing, dingalinging, Stupefying, fortifying, As of Monday, shoelace tying, Stimulating, titillating, Kitty-cat impersonating, Mega-rocking, pillow-talking, Just a little crooked walking, Coyly pouting, booby-sprouting, For some reason always shouting, Fascinating, captivating, Happiness and joy creating... Down syndrome girl!