cheryl had a dog named skip that she loved to bits
he had big sad eyes and he was gentle around the kids
he could do tricks that would amaze you,
but he developed hip dysplasia
the veterinarian said ‘it’s surgery or euthanasia
’ cheryl asked how much would it cost to get skip sorted
the vet said if you have to ask then you can’t afford it
well, she could barely make the rent
she said ‘skip, you know you’re my best friend’
and she made sure he couldn’t see the needle at the end
she hummed the bass line to ‘north window’ by the inbreds just to keep from crying
she took the bus downtown ‘cause she was too upset to drive
once upon a time there was a ten year old boy named dave
he liked cars and karate and he hardly ever misbehaved
he got it into his little boy head
that he didn’t want to eat anything dead
he told his parents ‘no meat, just french fries and bread’
dave’s daddy was a dude who didn’t deal with dissent too good
he said ‘while you’re under my roof i want this clearly understood:
you’ll eat whatever mama is making, be it beef baby back ribs or bacon’
he slammed his fist down on the table so hard it set the silverware shaking
dave got sent to his room and he lay on his bed and said i wonder where my real parents are
and he cried himself to sleep under a ceiling full of glow in the dark stars
if there are victory bells we should ring them
if there are victory songs we should sing them
‘cause we are the kings of the animal kingdom
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