this is a method you use to ignore your words. this is the way that i train myself never to make light of anyone's concious desicion. it's more than discursiveness. i'll keep that in mind for the next time. but this psudo-ignorance plee is enough to dismiss any credit that you may have been earning back. forensics show signs of uncertainty but can't find a trace of remorse. still this pity extracts every word i hold from every other friend's mouth. this time there's no cut around eyes that long to dismiss this as a misunderstanding instead of a misgovernment. after monitors are positioned. voices carry through wires and space. if this incident's purpose served only to make an example of me, then ask yourself "was it worth it?". halfway there. two down, two to go. it's abdication. your remission. guess it's setting in. guess i've won. if that's what you'd call this disparagement. headwind hurts more than said words. windward winds held more than hate. halfway there. before i found something wrong. hate held there hurts more than you hold onto. hold on as hard as you can. first one to break will be the first one to fall. it's far from done. this far from home, and far from falling. someday i'd like to forget my way home.