Ol' Saint Nick's got burban breath It's so cold you could catch your death A cop sold me some crystal meth It's a Merry Fucking Christmas
Everything's so Chritmassy The streets are twinkling with frozen pee My priest just sat on santa's knee It's a Merry Fucking Christmas
All the kids go to bed each night to dream what santa brings 'em (brings 'em) Unless they're jewish or muslim or some other gyp religion Crappy toys flying off the shelves Midgets dressed up to look like elves Spread good cheer or burn in hell It's a Merry Fucking Christmas
All the kids go to bed each night to dream what santa brings 'em Unless they're jewish or muslim or some other gyp religion Cracklin' fires to keep me warm And my collection of asian porn Cradle my bells and work my horn It's a keep on truckin', last year suckin', midget chuckin', slap the puckin', how much wood could a wood chuck chuckin', Merry Fucking Christmas