DR. SCOTT: From the day he was born He was trouble He was the thorn In his mother's side She tried in vain
CRIMINOLOGIST: But he never caused her nothing but shame
DR. SCOTT: He left home the day she died!
From the day she was gone All he wanted Was rock & roll porn And a motor bike Shooting up junk
CRIMINOLOGIST: He was a lowdown cheap little punk
DR. SCOTT: Taking everyone for a ride
CHORUS: When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy You knew he was a no good kid But when he threatened your life With a switch blade knife
FRANK: What a guy!
JANET: Makes you cry!
DR. SCOTT: And I did!
COLUMBIA: Everybody shoved him I very nearly loved him I said \"Hey listen to me. Stay sane inside insanity\" But he locked the door and threw away the key!
DR. SCOTT: But he must have been drawn Into something Making him warn Me in a note which reads
CHORUS: What's it say? What's it say?
EDDIE: I'm out of my head! Oh, hurry or I may be dead! They musn't carry out their evil deeds!
CHORUS: When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy You knew he was a no good kid But when he threatened your life With a switch blade knife
FRANK: What a guy!
JANET: Makes you cry!
DR. SCOTT: And I did!
CHORUS: When Eddie said he didn't like his teddy You knew he was a no good kid But when he threatened your life With a switch blade knife