I woke up this morning Oh my, what a terrible surprise My ears and nose had fallen off in the middle of the night On my way to work my hand got jammed in a door I still can’t believe it, my whole arm fell on the floor
Two dogs began to follow me While I was walking down the street Then one of them bit my leg And ran away with it
This is the ballad of The decomposing man Who fell apart bit by bit Till there was nothing left
So I quickly left the office I was totally upset My body was decomposing and I wasn’t even dead yet My skin was getting swollen, my hair had already gone I even lost an eyeball on the bus while I was riding home
When I finally got home My wife had already fled Oh, I tried really hard not to lose my head
This is the ballad of The decomposing man Who fell apart bit by bit Till there was nothing left
Oh, what an awful day I had With stressful days like this It can get really hard to keep Oneself all in one piece