“Hello Doris, I’m just about to dry my hair” You got hair on your knees, you got hair on your arms You got hair on your brow, you got hair on your palms You got hair on your fingertips and when you’re embalmed You’ll have hair on your kidneys, they’ll be alarmed Hairy man… You’re hairy when you’re angry, you’re hairy when you’re calm If you had a personality it would be a hairy charm You’re sitting in the freakshow like a monkey in the zoo You’re looking at them monkeys and they laugh at you Hairy man… You got a hairy passport, you’re hairy through and through You got a hairy garden the sky is hairy too When you eat your food you got a hairy chew And when you go to the toilet it’s a hairy loo Hairy man… hairy man… hairy man… what you gonna do