Are you frightened by the weight you possess? Oh Is this life just weightlessness? And smoggy twilight in LA I can't think of one real thing to say
And you and me are walking in the canyons She forgets that we were friends I guess it all depends on your mood Why can't these meds be any damn good?
And she said, why can't you be Like my Waterpik shower massager? A sweet reliable machine And to tell the truth I don't feel less alone A water massager's the purest love I've ever known Why can't you be like when I was thirteen?
And I said, why can't you be Like an art house foreign movie? Frank and sexy, red balloons and ennui And allude to me and why can't you be A little more of a mystery?
Why can't you be the part of me that's missing? Instead of leaving me for some other Said we're perfect for each other And I know we won't go spend this life alone
And she said, why can't you be Like an outsourced government contract? I'm a fat cat getting away with anything
Kicking some secret special powers Illumination rounds in showers 'Cause you're tearing your hair out While we can have a bed of flowers
And I said, why can't you be Like the chicks out on the road? Some girls are happy just to see me 'Cause you got moxie and a broken nose Take 'em away from this prose
Sometimes a blow job's not enough Why can't you play a little less rough?
Why can't you be the part of me that's missing? Instead of leaving me for some other Say we're perfect for each other And I know we won't go spend this life alone
Can we just leave it be? We could live our lives separately Could you forget what happens to you? To you and me
When we're dead and we'll be dead We'll have eternity And I will spend it all, missing you Missing you and me So while I'm alive I will always be
Seeking you out, digging you out Wondering about how it goes so far down And what's wrong with you? What's wrong with you and me?
And she said, why can't you be Someone looking deeper into me? Like JD Salinger, why do I challenge her In all these selfish ways that you displease Why can't you be a little more at ease?
Well, why can't you be Like a hand rolled cigarette? I'm not joking This masochistic self-pity of smoking And this city ditty, I keep provoking you to leave me
And she said Why can't you be like a candle I can snuff? You're still the diamond in the rough And I swear to God I've had enough How can I call your bluff?