See this tribute to no one but myself, in the form of a portrait painted by the hands of a friend. It glares at me in all my glory - the eyes of a beast. The will of a demon. and a lifetime of sins. The next winter, when the woods are bare and exposed - you won’t / don’t get another. Not a second. Not another. I’ve wiped your name from the corner, ignoring you were ever there. I killed a woman and I killed a friend. I am Faust. I am Christ. I discard the love Venus, I discard eternal life. In spite of you. In front of you. In place of and in shame of you.
In eighteen years... No, longer, I haven’t aged a second. You did this to me out of love. I never believed you could. I stare into the only mirror I need. I can’t stand this hideous fucking face. This is my life and nothing can change that shape. How the oil has stricken the canvas. The eyes of a beast, the soul of winter. I killed a woman and I killed a friend. I am Faust and I am fucking Christ. I discard the sex from Venus and I discard eternal life. In front of you - I’m sorry.