Our boy kitty Callan is overly male He howls and he struts and he calls Testosterone poisoning has turned off his brain So now he just thinks with his balls.
Oh yow, ow, row-row-ow ow Hey baby, come here and I’ll jump you If it moves then I’ll screw it There’s just nothin’ to it If it don’t move, it’s easier still
Poor Callan’s so desperate for someone to love That he doesn’t care much about gender As long as it’s feline, he gives it a try And implores them with words strong and tender:
Oh yow, ow, ow-row-row ow Hey buddy, you mind if I jump you? If it moves then I’ll screw it There’s just nothin’ to it If it don’t move, it’s easier still
Now Callan’s quit eating, his mind is on sex He’s singing love songs to the sofa Stuffed animals cringe when he enters the room And he calls to them over and over:
Oh yow, ow, ow-row-row ow Hey Teddy, stay put and I’ll jump you If it moves then I’ll screw it There’s just nothin’ to it If it don’t move, it’s easier still
When a girl comes to visit, he turns on the charm And he woos her with bravado and song Then his hormones kick in and he jumps on her neck Like a caveman he drags her along
Oh yow, row, ow-ow-row row He sings with his mouth full of girl fur Hey babe, just you wait This is gonna be great Don’t blink or you’ll miss the big moment --