hey link, get off your butt, grow a pair of deku nuts first save the deku tree, you tree huggin hippie stop playing with your deku stick, and raid that spider bitch
don't call me fairy boy, you horsey whore bitch please! i've got the master sword side-hoppin hyrule field, straight for gannondorf bitch please! i've got the master sword
seven years pass... link awakens, now complete with pubes can't stop thinkin about zelda's boobs but they can wait, i'm goin fishin i would relax but, navi won't stop bitchin back to work, slay the phantom and the dragon if i don't hurry those boobs will be saggin the water temple is full of link's tears cause it cost him another seven years shadow and spirit, collect more hearts and shit visit the great fairies and their triangle tits
storm into gannon's castle, sword into gannon's asshole i am the king of hyrule, my name is link and i rule