Hey Link, get off your butt- grow a pair of Deku Nuts
First save the Deku Tree, you tree huggin hippie
Stop playing with your Deku Stick, and Raid that spider bitch
Don't call me "fairy boy," you horsey whore
Bitch, please! I've got the Master Sword
Side-hoppin Hyrule Field, straight for Gannondorf
Bitch, please! I've got the Master Sword
Seven years pass...
Link awakens, now complete with pubes
Can't stop thinking about Zelda's boobs
But they can wait, I'm going fishin
I would relax, but Navi won't stop bitchin
Back to work, slay the phantom and the dragon
If I don't hurry those boobs will be saggin
The water temple is full of Link's tears
Because it cost him another seven years
Shadow and Spirit, collect more hearts and shit
Visit the Great Fairies, and their triangle tits
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