Take my word for it, I'm not worth it. I ignored you all night and you don't deserve it. Morning, bathtub, my skin soft and hot. I was sure you were right, but you're not. I contemplate my ruined fate. Someone will hurt me so bad one day. And you'll resonate or I'll apologize or maybe I'll make the same mistake twice. I hide from phonecalls under the warm water. Malice desists, no it woefully recurs. And it plays like daytime tv shows. I confuse you. And I tell you not to love me but I still kiss you when I want to. And I lament, you're innocent, but somehow the object of my discontent. And its fucked up. I let you in even though I've seen what can happen.
You make a tape. I receive it in the mail and I force myself busy. The diversion will prevail. And I will swallow all my guilt with little pills and forge my chin up. And I will only think about it in the morning, in the bathtub.