I'm not the brightest crayon in the box Everyone says I'm dumber than a bag of rocks I barely even know how to put on my own pants But I'm a genius in France (yeah), genius in France, genius in France
Hoom chaka laka Hoom chaka laka Hoom chaka
I may not be the sharpest hunk of cheese I got a negative number on my SATs I'm not good looking and I don't know how to dance But nevertheless and in spite of the evidence I am still widely considered to be A genius in France, a genius in France, a genius in France
People say I'm a geek, a moronic little freak An annoying pipsqueak with an unfortunate physique If I was any dumber, they'd have to water me twice a week
But when the Mademoiselles see me, they all swoon and shriek They dig my mystique, they say I'm c'est magnifique When I'm in Par-ee, I'm the chic-est of the chic
They love my body odor and my bad toupee They love my stripey shirt and my stupid beret And when I'm sipping on a Perrier In some cafe town in St. Tropez
It's hard to keep the fans at bay They say, "Sign my poodle, s'il vous plait" "Sign my poodle, s'il vous plait"
Folks in my hometown think I'm a fool Got too much chlorine in my gene pool
A few peas short of a casserole A few buttons missing on my remote control A few fries short of a happy meal I couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel
Instructions on the heel Instructions on the heel
But when I'm in Provence, I get free croissants Yeah, I'm the guy every French lady wants And if you ask 'em why, you're bound to get this response (He's a genius in France! Genius in France!)
That's right (He's a genius in France, genius in France) You know it (He's a genius in France, genius in France, genius in France)
I'm not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree But the folks in France, they don't seem to agree They say, "Bonjour, Monsieur would you take ze picture with me?"
I say, "Oui, oui" That's right, I say, "Oui, oui" "Oui, oui" He says, "Oui, oui"
I'm dumber than a box of hair But those Frenchies don't seem to care Don't know why, mon frere But they love me there
I'm a genius in France Yeah, I'm a genius in France
Gonna make a big splash when I show up in Cannes Gonna make those Frenchies scream "You ze man! You ze man! You ze man!"
Like a fine Renoir (waa), I've got that je me c'est quoi (quoi!) Like a fine Renoir (ooh la la), I've got that je me c'est ... Quoi quoi quoi quoi quoi, oo-we-oo Quoi quoi quoi quoi quoi, oo-we-oo
Bow diddy bow di bow di bow bow diddy Bow diddy bow di bow di bow bow diddy Bow
[snort]
I'm a taco short of a combo plate But by some twist of fate, all the Frogs think I'm great Oh, the men all faint and the women scream They like me more than heavy cream
When I'm in Versailles, I'm a popular guy My oh my, I'm as French as apple pie (apple pie) They think I'm awful witty, a riot and a half When I tell a stupid joke, they laugh(haw haw haw haw haw) And laugh (haw haw haw haw haw haw)
People in France have lots of attitude They're snotty and rude, they like disgusting food But when they see me, they just come unglued They think that I am one happening dude
Bowm ba ba bowm ba bowm ba bowm I'm about as sharp as a bowling ball But they like me better than Charles de Gaulle
Entre nous, it's very true The room temperature's higher than my IQ But they love me more than Gerard Depardieu How did this happen; I don't have a clu