I am the left brain, I am the left brain I work really hard 'til my inevitable death brain You got a job you better do it right in the right way is with the left brains might
I like oreos and pussy yah! (yes, in that order) And I cried for at least an hour after watching Toy Story 3 (Woody!) Cause I am the right brain, I have feelings, I'm a little all over the place but I'm lustful and trustful and I'm looking for somebody to love... Or put my penis in
Here comes a female, here comes a female Puff your chest. I'll take your phone out and check your email Or evolutionary purpose is to repopulate So gather data now and see if she's a possible mate
Holy fuck I think she might be the one, there's something about her, I just can't describe it Tits I am the earth, she is the glorious sun I want her to trust me and I just want her to- how do i say this- sit on my face! (Sit! Sit on my face!)
Alright now right brain you're being insane No left brain, I'm just being alive You should try it, you might like it
I worked hard to give him everything he cared about You were worried about the things that he was scared about I'm calm and collected when you act wild I am the adult, you are child
You think you're the right one every time You think you know everything but you don't know anything at all Half of his problems were supposed to be mine But you wanted everything. I hope that you're happy 'cause he's sure not
Well according to my calculations, I'm sorry just let me run the numbers again, you're a giant pussy
Really name calling? Really? You're gonna just do name calling?
I'm name calling names alright, I'm just stating facts alright, the fact is you're a quivering pussy
I'm the pussy? Really? Well at least I don't play with toys still
Rubik's cubes are not toys alright, they keep my spacial rethink skills... sharp
Left brain plays with toys! Haha, fucking, Look at you, Mr... you're a toy player
Well at least I did my fucking job, all right. I kept him working, I kept him productive You were supposed to look after him You were supposed to keep him emotionally stable for all this Now you're trying to blame me for how he's feeling, how he's feeling! If he's feeling unhappy it's because you failed him You did this to him, he hates you I know he does, he fucking hates you!
Right brain, look, I'm sorry, okay?
No, you're not
Look, maybe there's something we could do together
Together?
Take the best parts of both of us and put them together
I'm listening
It would let you let your feelings out, it would let me analyze
So you could man the themes; I'll man the form. It's something that George Carlin did, it's something Steve Martin did It's something special that we could both perform. Do you know what it is?
Juggling, we could juggle, and juggle our cares away!
It was comedy, you, fuck it, we could do comedy together.
(Initiate reassembly)
All right, right brain we're gonna do comedy together, we gotta do comedy together
All right, left brain I'll do comedy with you
Look, we can fix him like this- we can make him happy again. I promise, all right