Bilbo Baggins (The True Story of the Shire Cannibal)
When they found a dead man's head In the middle of a turnip bed They knew that Baggins was back in the hood He was the terror of the Shire and now he's back for their lives and that's no good
Around the neighborhood he prowled to get his bit of hobbit skulls and suck their brains and as he scowled his rotten teeth Even the Nazguls got the creeps and Sauron too - he was afraid
They called him Bilbo Baggins He used to eat his neighbors He hacked and bagged their corpses And then he fried their torsos
They called him Bilbo Baggins He liked to cook his neighbors Unleashed his carnal wantings onto the poor hobbits
They said that once he caught a troll Beheaded him and disembowled and ate his guts Old Bilbo was a maniac A necrophagophiliac Yes - he was nuts