18. of May. 10:48. It feels so hard to describe what do I feel right now, I have been trying again and again to do this. I just can't. I've lost all my feelings. What I used to love before, what used to please me, I don't feel anymore. I don't feel joy, I don't feel anger. I feel nothing but the emptiness and inner cold. I feel like I'm watching this world from the side, through the glass. I am here right now, but I am no more. There's something very wrong with my head. It feels like there are loads of thoughts, but they are all so chaotic. But at the same time my mind feels so empty. Absolutely empty. I can't think, I can't concentrate on something. I don't care about people. I don't care about my life anymore. The only thing I want is to end this slow torment. To disappear forever. I want to isolate myself from this life, from this world. I can't live like this anymore. I can't go on like this. Anymore. I want to die silently so that nobody will ever notice my absence. I want to disappear forever. To live in my dream until the end of time.
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