* My team's all trash, I'm wondering why I queued up a game at all MMR goes out the window, and I can't CS at all But even if I could twitch spams more memes, Envy's picture on my wall It reminds me, that it's not so sad, it's not so sad...
Dear Artour, I wrote you but you still ain't calling I left my twich, my twitter, and my steam name at the bottom. I sent two donations back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at twitch alerts or something. Sometimes I write messages too vulgar when I jot 'em But anyways. Fuck it, what's been up? Man how's your team? I've got a team, too, I'm bout to win RD2L If I win a tourney, guess what I'ma say? I'ma say \"2EZ\" I read about your Uncle Peter, too, I'm sorry I had a friend get salty over some team who didn't want him I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan I even got the underground shit that you did with Kaipi. I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man I like the shit you did with Speed, too, that shit was phat. Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to talk, truly yours, your biggest fan This is chat.
* My team's all trash, I'm wondering why I queued up a game at all MMR goes out the window, and I can't CS at all But even if I could twitch spams more memes, Envy's picture on my wall It reminds me, that it's not so sad, it's not so sad...
Dear RTC, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you play a scrim I ain't mad - I just think it's FUCKED UP you don't play on stream If you didn't wanna respond to a donation meme You didn't have to, but you coulda BabyRage'd for Matthew That's my little brother man, he's only 2k rank solo We waited in the blistering queue for you, Four hours and you just said, \"4Head\" That's pretty shitty man - you're like his fucking idol He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to Remember when we met in Seattle - you said if I'd write you You would write back - see I'm just like you in a way I never won a Valve LAN neither; My offlanes are retards and feeders, So I can relate to what your sister says on stream, So when I have a shitty game, I just watch you flame your team 'Cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed I even got a tattoo with S A D B O Y S across the chest Sometimes I even run down mid to see how much I can feed It's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me See everything you say is real, and I respect you 'cause you tell it My subreddit's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7 But they don't know you like I know you artour, no one does They don't know what it was like for people like us growing up You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest retard you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, Chat -- P.S. We should queue together too.
* My team's all trash, I'm wondering why I queued up a game at all MMR goes out the window, and I can't CS at all But even if I could twitch spams more memes, Envy's picture on my wall It reminds me, that it's not so sad, it's not so sad...
Dear Mister I'm-Too-Good-To-Stream-Or-Acknowledge-My-Fans, This'll be the last donation I ever send your ass! It's been six days and still no stream - twitch don't deserve it? I know you got my last two donations; I wrote the memes on 'em perfect! So this is my plea I'm sending you, I hope you read it. I'm in a pub right now, I'm doing 200 apm on my keyboard Hey Artour, I first picked Gyro, you dare me to mid? You know the song by Yung Lean, called \"Yoshi City\" That had a meme that coulda saved that other meme from expiring But didn't, then Artour saw it all on stream and acknowledged it? That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued you from drowning Now it's too late - twitch is 1000 spammers now, we're drowsy And all we wanted to do was try to prevent your fall I hope you know we spammed SPROUTED all over your wall Twitch loved you Artour, we coulda spammed together, think about it You ruined it now, I hope you can't stream and you can't find a team about it And when you dream about TI 5 I hope you can't sleep and you BabyRage about it I hope your teammates SCREAM AT YOU and you can't PUB without us! See Artour, (ughh) Shut up Peter, we're trying to talk! Hey Artour, that's Peter screaming in the trunk, But we didn't dump his team, we just spammed his wall up, see we aren't like you 'Cause if he stops playing, and then his career will die, too Well, gotta go, we're almost at Manilla now Oh shit, we forgot, how we're supposed to cheer for you now?
* My team's all trash, I'm wondering why I queued up a game at all MMR goes out the window, and I can't CS at all But even if I could twitch spams more memes, Envy's picture on my wall It reminds me, that it's not so sad, it's not so sad...
Dear Twitch, I meant to stream for you sooner but I've just been busy You said your girlfriend is in the 1k bracket now, how far along is she? Look, I'm really flattered you would call your team that And here's a BabyRage for your brother, I wrote it on the Lvl 10 Starter Pack I'm sorry I didn't see you at the Tourney, I musta missed you Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you But what's this shit you said about you like to queue for pubs too? I say that shit just clowning dawg, C'mon - how fucked up is you? You got some issues Twitch, I think you need some counseling To help your ass from bouncing off the walls when I get down some And what's this shit about @@@@@@@@@? That type of shit'll make me not want to stream at all. I really think you and your teammates need each other Or maybe you just need to treat them better I hope you get to read this shitpost, I just hope it reaches you in time Before you burn yourself out, I think that you'll be doing just fine If you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but twitch Why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as fans I just don't want you to do some crazy shit I seen this one post on /r/DotA2 a couple weeks ago that made me sick Some dude took the lyrics to Kanye West and replaced them with SPROUTED And he had his memes out in full force, talking about it And in a 2nd post they made a song, but only addressed it to the few Come to think about it, the song was about... Artour