Tracie Bennett - Bridget Jones Diary_2 | Текст песни

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• Tracie Bennett
• Bridget Jones Diary_2

11.45 p.m.Ugh.First day of New Year has been day of horror.Cannot quite believe I am once again starting the year in a single bed in my parents' house.It is too humiliating at my age.Having skulked at home all day, hoping hangover would clear,I eventually gave up and set off for the Turkey Curry Buffet far too late.When I got to the Alconburys' and I was still in a strange world of my own - nauseous,vile-headed,acidic.I watched resignedly as Una Alconbury's form - intriguingly deformed through the ripply glass door bore down on me in a fuchsia two-piece
'Bridget!We'd almost given you up for lost!Happy New Year!
'Sorry.I got lost
'She got lost,everyone!
'Bridget!Happy New Year!said Geoffrey,clad in a yellow diamond-patterned sweater.He did a jokey Bruce Forsyth step then gave me the sort of hug which Boots would send straight to the police station
'Hahumph,'he said,going red in the face and pulling his trousers up by the waistband.Come on,let's get you a drink.How's your love-life, anyway?'
Oh God.Why can't married people understand that this is no longer a polite question to ask?We wouldn't rush up to them and roar,'How's your marriage going?Still having sex? Everyone knows that dating in your thirties is not the happy-go-lucky free-for-all it was when you were twenty-two and that the honest answer is more likely to be,'Actually,last night my married lover appeared wearing suspenders and a darling little Angora crop-top...'than,'Super,thanks
Not being a natural liar,I ended up mumbling shamefacedly to Geoffrey,'Fine,'at which point he boomed,'So you still haven't got a feller!
'Bridget!What are we going to do with you!'said Una. 'You career girls!I don't know!Can't put it off for ever, you know.Tick-tock-tick-tock
Fortunately my dad rescued me.'I'm very pleased to see you, Bridget,' he said, taking my arm.'Your mother has the entire Northamptonshire constabulary poised to comb the county with toothbrushes for your dismembered remains.Come and demonstrate your presence so I can start enjoying myself.How's the be-wheeled suitcase?
'Big beyond all sense.How are the ear-hair clippers?
'Oh, marvellously - you know - clippy
It was all right,I suppose.I would have felt a bit mean if I hadn't turned up,but Mark Darcy...Yuk.Every time my mother's rung up for weeks it's been,'Of course you remember the Darcys,darling.They came over when we were living in Buckingham and you and Mark played in the paddling pool!He's just back from America,apparently.Divorced.He's looking for a house in Holland Park.Apparently he had the most terrible time with his wife.Japanese.Very cruel race
Then next time,as if out of the blue,'Do you remember Mark Darcy,darling?Malcolm and Elaine's son?He's one of these super-dooper top-notch lawyers.Divorced.Elaine says he works all the time and he's terribly lonely.I think he might be coming to Una's New Year's Day Turkey Curry Buffet,actually
I don't know why she didn't just come out with it and say,'Darling,do shag Mark Darcy over the turkey curry,won't you?He's very rich
'Come along and meet Mark,' Una sing-songed before I'd even had time to get a drink down me.
The rich,divorced-by-cruel-wife Mark - quite tall - was standing with his back to the room, scrutinizing the contents of the Alconburys' bookshelves:mainly leather-bound series of books about the Third Reich,which Geoffrey sends off for from Reader's Digest.It struck me as pretty ridiculous to be called Mr Darcy and to stand on your own looking snooty at a party.It's like being called Heathcliff and insisting on spending the entire evening in the garden,shouting'Cathy'and banging your head against a tree
'Mark,'said Una,as if she was one of Santa Claus's fairies.'I

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